`What our ancestors would really be thinking, if they were alive today, is:
 "Why is it so dark in here?"'

        -- Terry Pratchett, Pyramids


"All assassins had a full-length mirror in their rooms, because it would be
 a terrible insult to anyone to kill them when you were badly dressed."

        -- Terry Pratchett, Pyramids


"Ibid you already know."

        -- More Discworld philosophers (Terry Pratchett, Pyramids)


"The Ephebians made wine out of anything they could put in a bucket,
 and ate anything that couldn't climb out of one."

        -- Terry Pratchett, Pyramids


"Nature abhors dimensional abnormalities, and seals them neatly away so
 that they don't upset people.  Nature, in fact, abhors a lot of things,
 including vacuums, ships called the "Marie Celeste", and the chuck keys
 for electric drills."  -- Terry Pratchett, Pyramids


"There was not a lot that could be done to make Morpork a worse place.
 A direct hit by a meteorite, for example, would count as gentrification."

        -- Terry Pratchett, Pyramids